January 19, 2002 :: 12:40 a.m.
I did it all for the rabbit
I'm bored. Oh, what a novel experience this is! Because you know, normally my life is just brimming with excitement and activity.
I've come to the conclusion that they put heroine in Trix. I can think of no other explanation for the ungodly temptation they present, or for my utter lack of willpower. I just can't say no to the red box, or to the stupid bunny, or to the sweet, delicious, fruit-shaped mana from heaven. The drugs have entered my blood stream, and now I am but a quivering, helpless mass of flesh with no hope of breaking my addiction. Soon I'll be out on the hardcore streets of Carlisle, selling my body to bald men with buck teeth and high socks for cereal money. Or in the event that no one wants to buy a rather unattractive, chubby girl with red-rimmed eyes and a bizarre tendency to call out for the Trix rabbit during sex, I shall be forced to resort to all-out crime and rob the nearest General Mills plant. I'll only take a few (thousand) boxes, I promise. I swear on my 12-step plan.
Moving on.
We're supposed to get snow tomorrow. Lots of it. Like 6-8 inches by day's end. I FUCKING HATE SNOW. Curse and a pox on all of you fucking wintry gods who think it's really funny to cover this place with snow, thus effectively halting transportation, thus keeping me so fucking house-bound that I may commit suicide with a piece of blunt currency.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
I like pina coladas - March 30, 2005
must... finish... projects... - March 22, 2005
Mr. Postman delivers the good stuff - March 18, 2005
when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
of fruits and menstruation - March 15, 2005