May 27, 2003 :: 3:22 p.m.
special skills: willing assassin
Well, it's another gorgeous, rainy day here in Ever-Fucking-Wet, PA. I really don't understand this sudden shifting of weather patterns, because Pennsylvania? Not fucking Seattle. If I'm going to live someplace perpetually wet and grey, I better get all the culture and good music to go with it. If I'm going to live in South Central PA, where there's nary an example of culture to be found outside of the interesting Amish folk and an insane proliferation of cows, I want some decent weather to ease the screaming pain that is my boredom. Okay? Okay.
I intended to drop into Bagel Lovers today and attempt to secure my old job, but that didn't happen. Adam told me that Borders in Camp Hill is hiring, so I immediately changed gears and ran over there to fill out an application. There was no "Now Hiring" sign, but the lady who gave me my application said that they're always accepting applicants. So I guess I'll give them a call on Thursday or Friday if they don't get back to me. Not that I'm expecting much, mind you, what with my miserable track record. I've applied to Borders AT LEAST ten times. I've had two interviews. But I've never gotten a job, for some reason. I'd really like to know why. What did I do? Who did I offend so horribly? Who the fuck do I have to bribe to get in the door? Seriously. Am I not dirty enough? Do I need more bits of metal dangling from my face to be counted as a qualified applicant? Is the homeless beggar look what they're going for? Because I've seen the people who work there, and it's not all sunshine and daily showers, let me tell you.
I mean, come on. I'd be the perfect bookstore employee. I was BORN to work in a bookstore. I'm well-kept, nice enough when necessary, and (most importantly) I love books with all of my shriveled little heart. What else do they want? Do I need to sell my soul? Who do I need to sleep with? Who do I need to kill? I'm willing to kill, too. It could totally be arranged. I just don't get why they won't hire me. They'd get half of my paycheck back every week anyway. Feh.
But I must remain optimistic, because otherwise the intensity of my confusion and negative thinking may actually cause my brain to explode. Then again, maybe a disfigured corpse in a body bag is exactly the kind of employee they're looking for.
Anyway. Adam's off filling out an application at Blockbuster, and Mason will be home soon to wrench my dear internet from my breast. As such, I'm all alone and soon to be very bored. I think it's DVD + knitting time. It's a good combination. MouseFest 2003 continues.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
I like pina coladas - March 30, 2005
must... finish... projects... - March 22, 2005
Mr. Postman delivers the good stuff - March 18, 2005
when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
of fruits and menstruation - March 15, 2005