June 27, 2002 :: 12:08 a.m.
stand still so I can see your silhouette
Erg. I just got out of the shower. My ears are sore, I'm guessing from the gauge change. Going from a regular earring to a 16 gauge isn't such a big jump, but it's still a little like birth: you're shoving something big (bigger, anyway) through a very small hole. It's bound to hurt a bit.
Adam called, and we talked some more. It was very good. It's not great that an issue had to crop up to pull the communication out of us, but hey, maybe it's that blessing in disguise thing. We really needed to talk, too, because this issue fucked (is fucking) with me more than anything has in a long time. It doesn't surprise me. It's not a new thing. This has always bothered me. But tonight he said something about school, and it made me realize that any small shreds of sanity that I'm still clinging to are going to go right down the toilet come fall. I'm going to lose my mind. I seriously just sat there for a few minutes after he said it and just thought to myself, good god, I'm really going to lose it. I really fucking am. It's freaking me out. I'm honestly afraid. *sigh* But in any case, it seems that the lines of communication have been opened. Out of evil comes good. We agreed to do it more often, for both our sakes (the talking thing, not the evil thing).
I have to work at 7 o' clock in the morning. Yick. I should go to bed now. I will, too, but I just wanted to write first. Archive that angsty beast of a previous entry. And now I have, soooo... goodnight, all. Be well.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
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when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
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