January 13, 2002 :: 10:44 p.m.
a dialogue between myself and my stomach
"Gurgle gurgle," my stomach said. "Feed me."
"No," I said. "I don't feel like feeding you."
"But I'm hungry," it cried. "I'm starving! Can't you hear me grumbling?"
"Oh, I can hear you," I said. "But I'm sad today, and besides, you're too fat. You don't need any food."
"Gurgle gurgle grumble gurgle grumble grumble!" My stomach flailed its fists wildly and started screaming. "You're trying to kill me, aren't you? You want me dead!"
"Oh, fine," I relented. I went to the kitchen and cooked up some spaghetti. I think my stomach's eyes are bigger than, well, itself, because after about half the bowl it started to complain.
"You're feeding me too much," it said. "I hurt."
I glowered at it. "Go away," I said. "You're insufferable."
It looked up at me with big, sad puppy-stomach eyes. "But I...," it began. I didn't let it finish.
"Go away, Tummy," I said. "We'll get together tomorrow. Maybe go to the store and get some lemon pudding."
Tummy perked up a bit at the thought of luscious, creamy, lemony pudding. I shooed it away, and it let out a dramatic sigh. I believe it was trying to make me feel bad. Usually it would have been successful, but today has not been a good day. Tummy went back to its place, and I went to the refrigerator to get some more water. Tummy was looking kind of dirty today - it could use a bath.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
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