February 09, 2002 :: 9:49 p.m.
we need your help, 007
Blah. My cramps hit full force this morning. I woke up clutching my stomach, actually. The urge to grab a kitchen knife and perform a c-section in the comfort of my own bedroom was outstanding. I think it's the only way to remove the rabid mole that is currently digging itself a new home in my uterus. Alas, I fell asleep again before I could execute my plan. Too bad. Now I'm doomed to yet another week of agonizing menstrual pain.
I am currently enjoying a frozen peanut butter cup. It's divine. Frozen is the only proper way to eat a peanut butter cup. I had dinner at Adam's, after he changed my oil (reason #735 that he's the best boyfriend ever) - lasagna. Mmm. His step-mom made a special little individual-sized spinach lasagna just for me, because she rocks and she's German. *laughs* Not that being German has anything to do with making lasagna. It's just fun to hear her "speak in tongues," as they say.
I was such a nice day out today. I wanted to find a patch of soft grass and just lie there for hours and hours. I didn't, of course, because there isn't any soft grass around here yet. Not for another few months. We've been having a very dry winter, so the grass is even more brown and prickly than usual. It would be like lying on a bunch of needles.
OH. Speaking of needles, last night I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and stepped on something quite sharp. "Ow," I said. I lifted up my foot to see what it was, and to my surprise, there was a very large hunk of wood sticking out of my sensitive sole. We're talking about a good inch long here, and not exactly paper-thin, either. "Hey," I said to myself, "this reminds me of Weetabix and her ass splinter." I chuckled. Then I threw the mini-log away. And then I finished brushing my teeth, because lord knows I need to brush them about 300 times a day or I'll get another half-dozen cavities.
My Sensodyne isn't working very well, either. I just drank some water and it was a most unpleasant experience. Damn you, five-dollar toothpaste! You taste like shit and you're not even doing your job! Damn you straight to hell!
*drools* I'm such a whore for Lindor truffles. I just ate my last one (I bought a few at Borders a while ago), and it was as close to orgasmic as food can get. I mean, it's chocolate filled with chocolate - how much better could it be? Not very, I say.
My parents were listening to 88.1 this morning, and they (the station, not my parents) were giving out tickets to the Rufus Wainwright concert. This excites me, because I'm going to that concert. I'm getting anxious. Someone named Teddy Thompson is opening for him. I have no idea who that is, nor do I really care. All I know is that in six days, at this very moment, I will be in Philadelphia experiencing Mr. Rufus and his glorious voice. For the second time. Ahh. Please excuse the drool trickling down my chin.
Okay, I'm watching Kidnapped on MTV and these children are insanely stupid. They didn't know what kind of insect a spider is, or what ESP stands for. Arachnid. Extra sensory perception. Ben Stiller was the comedian in the P. Diddy video. Brad Pitt played One Punch Mickey in Snatch. Dumb fucks. I need to be on this show.
When I was answering the question about scars in my last entry, I completely forgot the most amusing one of all. I cut myself with a plastic knife and it left a scar. I hadn't intended to cut myself - I mean, I didn't think a plastic knife was capable of such things - but cut myself I did. It's on my left hand. It just shouts "dumbass!"
I've been writing this for over an hour. Time to stop now.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
I like pina coladas - March 30, 2005
must... finish... projects... - March 22, 2005
Mr. Postman delivers the good stuff - March 18, 2005
when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
of fruits and menstruation - March 15, 2005