June 10, 2003 :: 1:23 a.m.
you two are the two who are the two
Okay, you know what? Crocheting is hard as fuck. How come I can teach myself to knit but not crochet? This is so very wrong.
Another very wrong thing is that, when I was watching a tiny little instructional video that was supposed to teach me to chain, the first thing I thought of was a grainy internet porn clip. The video consisted of two anonymous hands working a few chain stitches, and in my defense it really did look very sex-like, what with pulling the yarn through the loop and stuff. And crochet hooks are rather phallic. I think it was mostly the repetitive, emotionless movements that caused the association, though.
Oh, the frustration. I hate being bad at things. I generally avoid doing things that I'm not good at, which is fine because most of the things that I enjoy come pretty naturally. Knitting was easy to pick up, and I didn't think crocheting would be any different. And I didn't even have videos to teach me to knit. Grrr.
Moving on... today was fantastically unpleasant. There were nice bits, hanging out with Adam and such, but overall it was filled to capacity with the usual sinking sadness. My brain is not a good place to be. Any part of me would be a horrible vacation spot, actually, and in fact I would very much like to leave now. Blargh. But I did get my anti-baby pills, which is a relief. I also made an appointment for my yearly chock full o' fun gynecological exam. Sometimes I really hate being a girl. Most of the time, actually. We get so incredibly shafted in so many ways.
Adam and I started arranging my room this afternoon. It looks all right, but there's still much to be done. Like the demolition of the Leaning Tower of Boxes that is STILL taking up the center of my floor. It's reprehensible, really, but what can I say? I'm a sloppy packrat with no motivation to fancy the place up. It's not like anyone but me and occasionally Adam sees it anyway, and he already knows what a procrastinating slob I am. Also, I'm nearly out of places to put things. Already. I have three small bookshelves, a dresser, and a small cabinet. One bookshelf has been devoted to knitting paraphernalia (yarn, books, etc), one holds my cookbooks and some novels, and the third is filled with more novels and my DVDs. The dresser, of course, holds my clothes. The little cabinet is empty right now, but will eventually house the many boxes of occult books and supplies that have yet to be unpacked. But there's no place for the rest of the books, or the huge boxes of fabric and crafty things, or the hundreds of knick-knacks that can't just stay in boxes 'til I die. This whole "no actual storage space" thing is annoying as hell. I need a closet, people. I'm a girl. A messy girl with a fondness for collecting things. Someplace to stow it all is vital to my health and mental well-being.
I had cheesecake and french fries for dinner. Lunch was leftover pasta and garlic bread that Adam so kindly brought over - he's under the impression that I need to eat. Silly boy. I think his eyes must have stopped functioning or something. It'll be a very long time before my ribs start to show or my stomach is pouchy from starvation (instead of just plain fat), trust me. I really do need to go grocery shopping at some point, though. I need actual food that I can eat, like veggie burgers and apples and yogurt and cereal that isn't Frosted Mini Wheats. Because I really don't like Frosted Mini Wheats.
When I came home tonight, Mason informed me that Joe had called several times with some exciting news. Something about a job. Hrm. I'm still hoping for the Borders gig, but it's always good to have options, I guess. Adam starts a new job tomorrow, which will hopefully suck less than the last one the temp agency sent him out to - it lasted one day. You have to admit that that's pretty damn temporary, even for a temp agency.
Gah. This entry has been embarrassingly random, so I'm not even going to bother trying to come up with some unifying closer. I'm just going to spell-check this thing, post it, and then try my hand at crocheting one more time. Then it's off to bed, because I'm very tired for some reason.
Ciao.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
I like pina coladas - March 30, 2005
must... finish... projects... - March 22, 2005
Mr. Postman delivers the good stuff - March 18, 2005
when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
of fruits and menstruation - March 15, 2005