January 27, 2005 :: 12:47 a.m.
Society for the Prevention of People Who Hate Cake
Man, Wednesdays are long. And the fact that Wednesday is technically over now does nothing to change that, though it does make me feel a little wrong in talking about Wednesday as "today." But such is life and I shall persevere.
Today in 2D we started painting. I was not looking forward to this. I am not, in any way, a painter. I've always wanted to be. Painting. It's so romantic. So classical. Such a credible, respected, impressive form on artistic expression. And it's actual media! I'm not so good with the natural media, as we know. I'm more of a digital girl, but there is a little slice of my heart that's always yearned to be a painter. And I've tried, believe me. I've accumulated enough painting supplies over the years that even though I don't paint at all, ever, I didn't have to go out and buy a single item for this class. So I have the stuff. I've attempted to paint before. It's just never worked out. And since I have this really awful personality flaw that compels me to abandon any endeavor that I don't immediately excel at, well, let's just say that I was really not looking forward to this class.
But it was, all things considered, less with the tragedy and humiliation and gnashing of teeth than I'd expected. You might even consider it a success, if you're more optimistic than me. I mean, I don't completely suck. There may actually be a glimmer of talent hidden underneath the lack of any clue as to what I'm doing. But it was certainly challenging, and a bunch of people in my class are really excellent and that made me feel pretty crappy in comparison. Also, I think my rabid insecurity and fear of fucking everything up kicked me into Anal-Retentive Overdrive, because it took me 3 1/2 hours to paint a head of hair. THREE AND A HALF HOURS! Seriously, all I got done in nearly 4 hours of solid work time was one head of hair. And actually, it's not even quite done. That is so sad. And a little bit scary. But it makes sense, I guess. Insecurity + lack of formal training/knowledge of how to properly use the medium + extreme desire to NOT screw up and look like a big fat art school poseur = my inner perfectionism coming out full force. Like, to the 23rd power.
So I have to work on it a little bit before class next week. Maybe if I spend a few hours on it I can get an arm done. A whole entire arm! Hey, it could happen.
Creative Writing was boring. Very, very boring. I don't mind the assignments, but the class itself grates. The teacher is nice enough, but not especially compelling. I was spoiled by Prof. Wallace, methinks. Also, I'm not so fond of my classmates. Any of then. So that doesn't really help things. I spent most of the period drawing "The Adventures of Grandmother Muumuu" in my sketchbook. Productive? Not so much. But entirely more entertaining than focusing my full attention on a class that really only requires one ear, or maybe just half an ear. Blah. Boringness.
School is annoying me this semester. It needs to be April now, please.
After class I came home and made (and ate!) some nummy potatoes, watched Project Runway, and then played Nintendo until I got frustrated and quit. I accidentally warped myself to Level 3, the world with all the swimming. I hate that world. 8-bit Mario is not a good swimmer. Accept it and move on.
On the agenda for tomorrow is testing out a cake recipe for Adam's birthday, feeding said cake to my friends so I don't eat it all myself, and then going to class in the evening. Not the most exciting day ever, but hey - cake! Who doesn't love cake?
Wait, don't answer that. It's just too horrible to contemplate.
back & forth
Wait, there's more!
I like pina coladas - March 30, 2005
must... finish... projects... - March 22, 2005
Mr. Postman delivers the good stuff - March 18, 2005
when everything is bad - March 16, 2005
of fruits and menstruation - March 15, 2005